WHAT MY FEAR TAUGHT ME ABOUT COURAGE
THIS IS WHAT FEAR TAUGHT ME ABOUT COURAGE
I’ve been afraid of many things in my life, but I faced a biggie earlier this summer at the Soul’s Calling Coach Training Retreat.
My teacher stood patiently waiting for me.
I was scared.
I’d watched the other women, one by one, learn from their own teachers and now it was my turn.
I was about to face a lifelong fear, so yes I was most definitely scared.
I heard the coach ask me, “On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being completely relaxed and 10 being terrified, how are you feeling?”
I stood very still, took a few deep breaths and checked in with my inner wisdom…my body.
Yes, I was scared! But then I noticed something strange...from the neck up (my head), I was an 8. BUT...from the neck down (my body), I was a 3.
How could my head be screaming an “8” and my body be saying a “3”? How was my head scared and my body relaxed?
Because my thoughts (my mind) were fueling my fear, while my inner wisdom (my body) knew I was safe.
In that moment I had a choice…listen to my inner wisdom (body) or my thoughts (mind).
As my teacher, an old mare, stood patiently waiting, I decided to trust to my inner wisdom and walked into the round pen with her.
Tears streamed down my face as I began to gently stroke the horse’s neck and release a lifetime’s worth of fear and shame. The shame that told me I shouldn’t be afraid of horses. The shame that told me there was something wrong with me for being afraid.
As I stood there with my hand on the horse's neck, I heard myself quietly say, “It’s OK. We’re going to be OK.” Of course those words were meant for me because the old mare already knew that we were OK. And in that moment I learned my biggest lesson of the day…
IT'S OK TO BE AFRAID AND STILL DO SOMETHING.
That day with the horse, I learned that courage doesn’t mean the absence of fear, it means deciding not to let fear be in control. It means deciding to listen to my inner wisdom rather than my thoughts.
Am I still afraid of horses? Yes, but not as afraid as I was before stepping into the round pen that day. In fact, I went in a second time later in the day. I also know that if I chose to spend more time with horses, my fear would fade even more.
Do I want to be around horses every day or be an equus coach like the one who worked with me that day? No. But how would I ever have known that if I hadn’t stepped into the pen in the first place?
How do we know if something is right for us if we never try it?
Courage doesn’t mean you’re not afraid. Courage means taking the first step despite the fear.
Brene Brown says, "You can choose courage or you can choose comfort, but you cannot have both."
Is there something that your soul is calling you to do but fear is telling you stories about why you shouldn’t or can’t do it?
You have a choice to make.
Choice #1: Live in comfort.
Believe the thought that you can't or shouldn't do something and let fear keep you from trying.
Choice #2: Choose courage.
Realize that courage does not mean the absence of fear but it means taking the first step despite the fear.
This is your choice.
I get it...choosing Choice #2 is scary!
But if you're really honest with yourself...
Are you happy living in comfort?
If the answer is no (even a little)...
Don't you owe it to yourself to choose courage?
YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO IT ALONE
Choosing courage doesn't mean you have to do it alone.
I had help when I got into the round pen with the horse earlier this summer. I had the support of an equus coach as I learned that I can be afraid and still do something.
Do you know that you were put here to do something?
I help women who’ve spent their lives putting everyone else first; women who’ve been hiding and coping with a deep feeling of unhappiness. They feel stuck and afraid because they don’t know how to move forward in finding the thing they were put here to do. I help them move past all the old programming that tells them what they should do and who they should be in the world so they can find their voice and gain the courage to be themselves and do the thing they were put here to do.
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